I get by with a little help from my friends…
Saturday, August 9th, 2008 | Uncategorized
I have wonderful friends. I knew that before Jonathan was born, but I guess with my current & raw emotional state, it hits home even more. My friends have shown support in so many ways, so many generous ways, that Chris and are kind of beside ourselves with thankfulness and gratitude. The other day I was thinking, I have so many people that want to come over to see me and the baby…how am I going to schedule it all? I worry that some folks may not understand the amount of energy a visit, even from great friends, takes out of me. Plus, the whole thing with the feedings. I’m not really good at the timing of it all yet and there is a very short window that will work for visitors right now. But then I realized how lucky it is to have so many people who care about me, and I remembered Erie.
It occured to me that when I was in Erie, all I wanted was a group of friends, just a few friends that I could do stuff with. I talked about it all the time. It was wet and gray and cold all the time there and we were house bound a lot of the time. We were so lonely up there and we met a great couple (Hi, Jen and Chris!) right before we left, but then we left. I realized this week that I have even more than I ever dreamt of in Erie and my life is full of wonderful people that care about me even when I don’t deserve it. I’ve made two truly regrettable mistakes when it comes to two of the greatest of my friends. And both of them have forgiven me and are allowing repairs to be made, which I am so very grateful for.
I have friends who are supporting me through this, without such support, I would be at risk of sinking into a very low state of baby blues. The look on everyone’s faces when they hold our baby is so heartwarming. I remember Crystal in the hospital, for example, with such a huge smile on her face as she held him. And the love beaming out of Steve and Kelly as they stared down at him. Everyone is so happy, it fills my heart. I have friends who regularly check on me everyday (Hi, Frannie & Michele!), I have friends who make sure I eat (Yummy lasagne, Craig and Buff!), I have friends who visit to help & cheer me up with adult contact (Hey, ya’ll!) and friends who don’t even know they are showing support by NOT visiting. They are being so patient with me. The space that these people are giving me to learn and understand my newborn in these first weeks is an invaluable gift. One by one, I’m starting to have people over, maybe one or two visitors a week. Soon, I’ll be back on my feet and this painful recovery will dwindle down to nothing and I’ll be begging them all to come over!! Or I’ll just show up at Benton and Jonathan and I will help grade papers in the afternoons 🙂
My family is another awesome support system. My husband, of course, who I’ve probably been too hard on, my Dad and brother who check on me daily and are willing to go get anything I need, and my mom. What do you do for your mom who takes the best care of you during this time? How can you show thanks to her? I mean I can say all the time or get her a great present, but all my ideas seem really stupid in comparision with what she is doing for me. We’ll figure something out, since her birthday is coming up, too, but maybe I’ll just do the best I can to raise my kid to be a great person and hope I came somewhat close to how she and my dad raised me. I hope I’m just like her.
2 Comments to I get by with a little help from my friends…
Ok, I meant to post this message to this blog 🙂
I love you Meg! You are such a wonderful friend to me! You don’t know how proud it made me to see one of my closest friends after having a beautifully perfect baby boy! And to get to hold the sweet thing, that will be a moment I remember forever
AnnaAugust 10, 2008
Hi, I’ve been following you guys by reading and viewing the pictures of that beautiful baby boy! I know you are so proud and your life is a little more “fuller” each day. It sounds to me like you are really getting a hang of it. I couldn’t help but laugh my butt off at some of your comments–it made me miss you even more:-( It is definitely not the same without you around Benton. Please stop by sometime and bring the baby by for me to see. I remember after I had Savannah that I didn’t want to see anyone and I would have paid them to leave, ha, ha! Just know that I am thinking about you guys–take care:-)
Anna
August 9, 2008